phew, finally a chance to catch my breath. it's been a crazy month and a half. i don't have a blog for 3rd block: ER, so i'll sum it up here.

ER is fast paced, sometimes busy, sometimes slow. I learned alot. I learned how to be fast. It was tough catching up to each attending's nuances, but you learn to adapt. I got to repair a couple of lacerations, which is where I discovered my love for repairing lacerations. I was always nervous about those, but once you jump in there and get it done, it's not so bad at all. It's an art. Night shift SUCKED ASS. I don't know how people do night shift. I wanted to be up when I had to sleep and I wanted to sleep when I had to be up. So that's ER in a nutshell.

Onto residency in general. I have one word to describe it: ROLLERCOASTER. Each day is different. One day you'll feel like the dumbest person on EARTH and feel like you've failed your patients. The next day you adjust and get everything covered, get some good feedback from attendings or patients and you're on top of the world. A day later your patient deteriorates and it's back down again, only to find the next day that patient improves, is lucid and thanks you for all the work you've put in. I'm telling you, it's a rollercoaster; on the way down you feel like your stomach is in your throat and you can't breathe but when you're up there, the high lasts long enough to get you through the bad times. I'm loving it, but can't avoid the fact that it's kicking my ass!

Onto personal life. So, I've been single for a while now and I've honestly been fine with it. However(and this is no offense to ANY of my friends who have spouses/significant others), as I see my friends getting married/meeting people, it makes me a little sad. Obviously residency doesn't help. I'm too tired ot go anywhere, and even if I did meet someone, where the hell would I find the time to hang out with them? I know a handful of people who are in residency and single. I mean we all do fine, but I wonder how many of them are feeling the way I am. It's funny I always thought I'd be settled by now, but unfortunately life doesn't work out the way you planned. Who knows if what you planned would have made you happy. So, as lonely as I am, I'll leave it up to fate and God to figure out my personal life for me. Until then, I'm uber thankful for all my good friends and my family, who keep me sane(or foster my insanity) through these trying times. I love you all!