27 going on 17

Somehow I thought I would be a little more grown up by the time I hit 27. I think a big part of that is because I still live at home with my mom and my sister, but there are other things too. I know you're not supposed to compare yourself with other people but it's hard not to when you are the outlier in a group of friends. I have friends and family who are planning weddings. Others have bought houses and some are preparing for a move out of state. I have another subset of friends who all have children and husbands to take care of. Most, if not all, have their own places and have independent lives from their families.

Mine is a special situation though. I keep telling myself that, but it doesn't help make it any less..."ok" for lack of a better word. There are various reasons why I choose to/feel like I have to stay living at home. For one, it's easier on my family if I'm home and able to babysit my sister as needed. Another reason is that it's just more practical for me to live here. I'm saving about 10 grand in rent a year, and I'm sure living alone wouldn't make me feel any less lonely than I already am. So in the end, I think it's the right decision. I love my family and consider them a priority. It's just hard to feel like an adult when you live under your mom's roof.

The only thing holding onto my adulthood is the fact that I'm going to be a doctor in 5 months and earning money in 7 months. Hopefully things will change by then. I'm planning on revamping my moms house with new flooring and also redecorating my room. I don't know what that will do, but it gives me a sense of change; a newness to it all. I just feel stagnant even though i'm "going places." I might as well try and take charge of the situation instead of sitting here feeling sorry for myself.